Stupid Actions
by pathetic-me
Summary: Draco has come across a predicament. How will he stop it and who will help him? Slash. don't like? don't read!
1. Chapter 1

Summary: Draco has come across a predicament. How will he solve it, and who will help him?

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters used in this story. They belong to the ever so talented J.K Rowling.

Warning: Angst, cutting and other nasties like that. Do not read if you are easily persuaded. SLASH yay!! And a bit of swearing.

Chapter 1: Stupid.

Draco sat on his bed with the curtains drawn, crying silently. He hated this. He always broke down into these crying fits and nothing ever triggered them.

"_Crying is weak Draco_." He heard his father's voice in his head. It was true. Crying was weak. He had to stop.

Then he remembered something his best friend Theodore had confessed to him.

"_It was so stupid. I shouldn't have done it. It was stupid. I cut myself!_"

Maybe that would stop it. He had to do something. Draco rummaged around in his bag for something sharp. When he felt something prick his finger, he grabbed it. It was his compass.

He rolled up his pants leg all the way to his thigh. With one last sniffle, Draco pressed the compass into his leg. When he saw a small bead of blood he dragged it across his leg for a good three centimetres.

As Draco watched the blood trickle down his leg, the seriousness and stupidity of what he had done hit him.

" I won't do that again. That _was_ stupid"

It had worked. Draco hadn't cried in weeks. But after those few weeks, it happened again and he did it again.

Draco shrugged it off. He wasn't trying to commit suicide or anything. It wasn't that bad.

But one Tuesday, it happened again. Draco felt that oh-so familiar feeling that told him that if he wanted to keep any of his dignity, he'd better run. He looked over at his Arithmacy teacher, who had his back to the class.

As quietly and quickly as he could, Draco packed up his things and crept out of the classroom. When he was out, he piss- bolted for the boys' toilets.

As soon as he was in one of the stalls, he broke down. He franticly searched for his compass.

When he found it, he held his breath to calm down enough to stop shaking.

This time, instead of just cutting, he scratched his way to blood. This hurt much more and therefore was a much better way to do it, in Draco's opinion.

Ten minutes later, Draco came out of the boys' toilets completely composed and wearing his Slytherin mask once again.

Draco didn't have the strength to stop. He knew this. He needed help. It was time to tell someone. But it had to be someone he trusted.

As he walked back to the dungeons, Draco thought about the person he trusted the most. He was unsure of who it was. That was, until he saw him.

This won't be easy!!

**Hey there. I know this is a short chapter, but I didn't want to go gung-ho into it and have no story to tell in future chapters.**

**This is my first fic so any reviews will be appreciated and I will personally thank anyone that reviews.**

**Draco: **_**Hell **_**of a cliff hanger. ::sarcasm::**

**Pathetic-me: Shut up! I'm trying!**

**Harry: It's me isn't it?!**

**Pathetic-me: Great! Now everyone knows!**

**Draco: It was pretty obvious!**

**Harry: Yeah!**

**Pathetic-me: I love you guys but right now I don't like you!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Confessions

"Hey!" Draco called.

Harry turned around and, upon seeing Draco, rolled his eyes and continued on his way. Draco jogged over to Harry and cut him off.

"What do you want Malfoy?" Harry asked, clearly not amused.

"Listen, can we stop being nasty to each other? I need to tell you something"

"what is it?"

_Once I say it, it'll be true! I need help. _

"This is really hard for me to say, and I understand if you don't care but I have to tell someone cause I can't do this on my own and I can't believe that you're the one I'm telling-"

"Your rambling." Harry interrupted.

"Ok! Don't interrupt me." Draco took a deep breath. "I've been…I've been" another breath "cutting myself." _It's out! _

"Oh" Harry was lost for words. Draco Malfoy, the boy who always got whatever he wanted whenever he wanted, was cutting himself.

"Why are you telling me this? Why not Parkinson or Zabini?" Harry asked.

"I trust you the most. I couldn't tell you why. I don't know why" Draco answered.

"So, what do we do about it?"

"You're going to help me?" Draco was shocked to say the least.

"Of course. If you trust me than I'll earn that trust."

"You've changed. What happened?" Draco asked.

"Long story short, I picked the wrong team."

"You finally ditched Weasleby and the mud blood?"

"Yes, but you still can't call them that."

"Fine!" Draco pouted

Harry's face suddenly lit up. _There should be a light bulb above his head!_ Draco thought. Harry grabbed Draco's arm and pulled him forward.

"Where are we going?" Draco asked.

"You'll see."

Harry pulled Draco all the way up to Gryffindor Tower. When they got there Harry let go of Draco's arm.

"Wait here." Harry said before slipping into the common room. A few seconds later Harry reappeared and took hold of Draco's arm once again. Draco was lead through the common room and up the stairs to the boys' dorms.

Once in Harry's room, Draco stopped. This was really weird. Half an hour ago they would have considered each other enemies.

Harry rummaged in his trunk until he found what he was looking for. He pulled out the coin that the D.A had used during 5th year.

"When you need me, just grab this coin. Look."

Harry gave Draco his coin and then squeezed his own. Draco's Coin lit up a blue colour.

"See?"

Draco Smiled. A genuine smile, not the ones he'd been faking to reassure his friends.

"Thanks"

**Ah! Another chapter down! Go me!**

**Draco: It's not like it was hard.**

**Pathetic-me: So?**

**Harry: We did more than you anyway.**

**Draco: Yeah. You just sat at the computer and typed!**

**Pathetic-me: If you guys aren't nice to me, there won't be any shagging!**

**Harry: Great chapter!**

**Draco: Two thumbs up!**

**Pathetic-me: Ok.**

**Readers, there will be bonking by chapter 4. A huge thanks to TornIntoPieces for being my first reviewer ever!**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 – Summer break

Draco sat in his room that night, twirling the coin Harry had given him. He thought about the coming summer break. He wasn't sure how he was going to cope. The more he thought about it, the harder it was to find a reason for his Depression. Suddenly, Draco started Crying again. He wiped away his tears furiously and tried to stop.

"Stop crying! Your being weak!" Draco said to himself. This wasn't working.

"Fine!" Draco pulled up his pants leg and grabbed his compass. Once he had done the deed, he looked at the coin again.

_Is it really worth telling Harry? He'll just worry. I'm not hurting myself or anything. _Draco mused. _No. I won't bother him._

The next day, Draco and Harry chatted.

"You never told me why you stopped being friends with-"

"Ron and Hermione?" Harry interrupted

"Yes" confirmed Draco.

"They didn't like what I had to say."

"What did you have to say?"

"I told them that I was gay"

"They didn't like that?"

"Not at all. You're not against that are you?" Harry asked.

"I'm about as against it as a gay guy could be."

"You're gay?"

"Yup"

They continued to chat for hours.

On the last day, the boys said their goodbyes.

"You take care of yourself." Said Harry.

"You too." Replied Draco. The two boys did that half hug half shake thing that guys do.

They got off the train and went their separate ways

Draco sat in his room. There was only two more weeks until he saw Harry again. Wait a minute, had he just thought that? No. There's only two weeks till school. Odd. He had been thinking of Harry all break. Draco looked at his clock. 3:27 am.

Draco had become somewhat nocturnal. He slept most of the day because he didn't want to see people and stayed up all night because it was peaceful. Draco had lasted most of the holidays because of this.

He thought about how lucky he had been when he felt it. The burning behind his eyes. He scrambled for his mirror. His nose was red. Then he felt it. The hot tears falling down his cheeks. He went for his compass before stopping. How would Harry feel? Draco took the compass and threw it across the room. He wouldn't do it. He lay down on his bead and stared at the ceiling. Soon he fell asleep.

When Draco woke up, he felt better. He continued his staring at the ceiling. He thought about what he had overcome. To him, crying was no longer weak. He thought back to the times he had cut himself. The pain and the blood. Come to think of it, seeing the blood was actually something he liked. How sick was that. He looked at his wrists. He had sworn at the beginning, he wouldn't end it. That's why he stuck well away from them.

He thought about the amount of blood that would come out.

_It would be impressive. If I didn't cut too deep I wouldn't die or anything._ Draco walked over to his draws. He had stuck a Stanley knife onto the bottom of the bottom draw incase of emergencies. He pulled it off and produced the blade. He held out his left arm and placed the blade on his wrist. He took a breath and slowly dragged the knife along his wrist. When he saw blood, he stopped.

Draco sat there, watching the blood trickle down his arm. His craving for blood, relieved.

A few days later, Draco lay on his bedroom floor, looking at the cut. It was extremely noticeable against his pale skin.

His thoughts wandered. Draco had told his parents about it. They fobbed it off as "being melodramatic". Draco hated that word. It was the word his mother used whenever he had something to say.

It was sad really. When a child is unhappy or sick, they want their mother to hug them and tell them that things would be all right. The only person to help him was Harry. Some strange part of his then spoke up

_**You don't want him to hug though. You want him to kiss you!**_

_What? Who are you anyway?_

_**Your subconscious. It's true! You love him.**_

_What ever!_

_**We both know it!**_

**Hey. I know I said it would be, but I don't know if I can fit the smut into chapter 4.**

**Draco: What!**

**Harry: Bitch!**

**Pathetic-me: If not I'll make it even better!**

**Harry and Draco wining in unison: Okay.**

**Listen. Next week, I end my summer holidays and go back to school (I live in Australia. Thank god! I get an extra day off before school cause of the Australia day public holiday!) I don't know when I'm gonna get the next chapter up.**

**Just think of it this way, the longer you wait, the better it is!**

**Draco: better be**

**Pathetic-me:: Sticks tongue out::**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 – Confession

Draco sat on the train. It hadn't left the station yet. He wondered if Harry was on the train or not. He looked out of the window at he heads of the students. As he stared, he thought he saw a familiar head. He panicked. Was it Harry? The head suddenly disappeared. Draco jumped up to find it but it was gone.

"What? Did the seat bite you?" Blaise Zabini asked, snickering. Draco turned around quickly to meet his friend. He grabbed his friend into a hug.

"How were your holidays" Blaise asked.

"Boring." Draco guessed that wasn't really lying. Some parts _were_ boring.

Blaise sat down across from Draco. As Blaise talked about his holidays, Draco worried about Harry. What if his aunt and uncle hadn't let him come back to Hogwarts?

"Drake?" Blaise asked. "You there?"

Draco snapped out of his trance. Blaise looked slightly pissed off.

"Did you hear me?"

"Yeah. Portugal then Athens. Sounds fun." Draco replied. Actually, it was really surprising that he heard it. He wasn't paying any attention!

Suddenly, the compartment door slid open. Harry stuck his head in and smiled.

"Hey" he said to Draco, but before he could answer, Blaise jumped up and yelled "WHAT THE FUCK" and rather dramatically punched Harry out cold.

Draco jumped up and rushed over to Harry. Blaise was extremely confused and asked the same question as he had before but this time, nicer.

Draco levitated Harry to the seat and laid him down before telling Blaise the story (forgetting to mention his problem as he went).

That night, Draco crept along the corridor leading to the Gryffindor common room. He crept right past the portrait and stopped at a tapestry and whispered

"Thank you marauders."

The tapestry faded and an archway appeared. Draco walked the tunnel ahead of him. When he reached the end, he stuck out his head. Everyone was asleep. Good. He walked into the 7th year boys' dorm and made a beeline to Harry's bed.

Draco opened the curtain and looked at the sleeping form that was Harry Potter. He jumped onto the bed and closed the curtain before casting a silencing charm. Once he had done this he whispered to Harry

"Harry, wake up." Harry didn't respond.

"Harry?" again, no answer. This time Draco yelled.

"Harry, wake up. You're late for class!"

This time Harry woke up. In fact, he jumped three inches and swore loudly. When he heard Draco laughing though, he calmed down. When Draco had finally stopped laughing, he handed Harry his glasses.

"Is everything alright?" Harry asked after a moment's silence.

"Yeah. I just wanted to see how you were. Blaise said to tell you he's sorry." Draco replied.

"Oh! I'm fine. I've dealt with worse than that before."

"Oh. Ok"

There was another silence, this time more awkward.

"Well, I should let you sleep." Draco said. He stuck his hand into his robe pocket.

"Here." He handed a note to Harry before jumping off the bed and practically running for the secret passage.

"See ya, Harry."

When Draco left, Harry opened the paper, before realizing that it was in fact, dark and he couldn't read anything. He grabbed his wand and cast _Lumos_. He read:

_Harry,_

_Over the past few weeks, I have done a lot of thinking._

_It was hard to come to terms with what I have found through my thinking._

_I love you._

_I have done for a while. I'm sorry. This has probably ruined our relationship but I needed you to know._

_If this is the last time I ever have the chance to say this to you, please know, you are the reason I'm still alive._

_Love always._

Draco 

As Draco walked back to his common room, he decided that, because he had just ruined the best thing in his life, he needed to be punished.

Hey, I'm SO sorry that I haven't updated for a while. School has been hectic and I haven't been able to get on the computer for ages. Thanks everyone that reviewed! Every one of them made me smile.

**Draco: Me too! I got a hug!**

**Harry: Yeah. Where's mine! **

**Pathetic-me: you haven't needed one yet. Don't worry! You will:: Laughs maniacally::**

**I will try my very bestest to have another chapter up soon. I know they're short but so is my attention span.**

**Also, can you tell me, who's a fan of m'preg? I just want to know for future chapters.**

**Blessed be.**

**Pathetic-me.**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 – kill me now

Chapter 5 – kill me now!

Harry sat in his bed. It had been a few hours since Draco had left. Harry was absolutely gob-smacked! He knew he couldn't sleep, even if he tried.

You know you're problem? You're happy! You're happy that he loves you! You love him too! Said one part of his brain

_**No you don't! That's just wrong! He's a guy! **_Replied another part of the brain

_**That's not the problem though. You are worried that you will be left again! That you will let him in and he will hurt you! **_ Said another part of his brain

_**NO! It's that you don't want him to get hurt if he gets close. You don't want another person you love to be hurt by Voldemort.**_

"SHUT UP" Harry yelled. Luckily the silencing charm was still up so he didn't wake anyone. Harry rummaged through his things until he found an old C.D Walkman he got after Dudley got an mp3 player. He only ever listened to one band. My Chemical Romance. He turned it on and put on his favourite song.

_We hold in our hearts the sword and the faith._

_Swelled up like a rain, clouds move like a wraith._

_Well after all, we'll lie another day,_

_and through it all, we'll find some other way,_

_to carry on through cartilage and flood._

_And did you come to stare or wash away the blood?_

Harry slowly allowed himself to drift away with the words and the hidden meanings within them.

For the next few days, Draco tried to steer clear of Harry. He knew that Harry didn't feel the same way, but he couldn't live with himself if he didn't tell Harry how he felt. Draco was sitting on his bed, trying and failing to do his potions homework, when a first year knocked on the door.

"WHAT?" Draco yelled. The first year gingerly opened the door.

"Urgent letter for Mr. Malfoy" he said quietly. Before the first year even had time to put down the letter, Draco had screamed "OUT!" so loudly that he was sure the first year boy had wet himself!

Draco got off his bed and picked up the letter. He roughly opened it and read:

_Draco,_

_Your time has come._

_The Dark Lord wants you to join us._

_This is your last chance to make me proud. DON'T disappoint me!_

_Your Father._

Draco couldn't believe it. He never truly thought his father expected this of him. He knew what he would do though. This gave Draco the perfect excuse. He had been looking for it for a while, the perfect excuse to end it. He grabbed a piece of parchment and scribbled a note to his father:

_Father,_

_I will never Join Moldy Shorts!_

_Fuck You!_

_Your dearest son, Draco._

He wasn't scared of his father anymore. By the time he got the letter, Draco would be cold and stiff. He tied it to his owl's leg and sent it on his way.

Now the had to execute his plan

**Hey Guys, Sorry I haven't updated in ages. I'm going to change the storyline. The next chapter will be the last. This chapter is especially short because there was nothing else I could write that wouldn't give away the next chapter.**

**Harry: Do I still need a hug?**

**Pathetic-me: Yes**

**Harry: I don't know if I want it!**

**Pathetic-me: Your fate has been sealed, my friend.**

**I will be working on the next chapter as soon as I post this one. Thanks for reading and waiting so long for this chapter. I'm sure it was disappointing. Sorry about that.**

**Pathetic-me**


	6. Chapter 6

Hey, I don't want to leave an A/u at the end of the chapter cause that would ruin it

**Hey, I don't want to leave an A/u at the end of the chapter cause that would ruin it. I just want to thank everyone who reviewed. It helped heaps. Sorry that things have been very un-organised. I suck at organisation. This has been my first fan-fic and I'm really thankful that you stuck by me. I just wanted to leave you with something that may help you understand this story a little better.**

**When I started writing this fan-fic, Draco was based heavily on me (not the falling for a mate thing, the depression). I was a heavy cutter and was depressed. In the middle or so of this fic, I saw a councillor. I also made a good friend. Let's call her Chibbi. Chibbi helped be get better just by being there for me when I needed to vent.**

**In the words of Gerard Way: "You're just pissing away your life on suicide. It's fucking bullshit"**

**If you are worried about depression or self-harming, you need to talk to someone. I'd be happy to talk to you if you find it hard to talk to someone close to you. There's always someone.**

**Enjoy the final instalment of "Stupid Actions"**

Chapter 6 – "We'll make it"

Harry sat in is room going over his plan.

"Find Draco, Tell Draco." He said to himself quietly. It was a simple plan, but that was all he was sure would happen.

It had taken ages to sort out his feelings for Draco and hadn't talked to him since that night, two weeks ago when Draco had left him the note. It now lay under his pillow.

Harry had tried so very hard to tell Draco how he felt yesterday, but had completely chickened out. He would not chicken out tonight.

He moved to get off his bed, but tripped over.

"Aw poop" he said quietly as he regained his composure.

Harry grabbed his invisibility cloak and the marauders' map and left the dorm through the secret passage.

When he exited the passage, he opened the map up to find Draco. Harry was sure he would be in bed; after all, it was gone midnight. Harry found Draco in the astronomy tower, so, that's where he headed.

Harry searched frantically for teachers. Tonight was too important for Harry to get caught.

When Harry had finally made it, he stopped and took a deep breath.

"Get it together Harry!" he whispered to himself before taking a step forward.

But Harry faltered again. Something told Harry he shouldn't be there. He quickly shook the feeling away and pulled a piece of parchment out of his pocket. It was the note Draco had given him. Harry read it for what seemed like the thousandth time. _I love you._ Harry finally gathered the courage to climb those final stairs.

Nothing could have prepared him for what he saw at the top of those stairs.

There was blood everywhere. Draco was lying on the floor, the gaping wounds from his wrists, the culprit of the blood that Harry now kneeled in.

"DRACO!" Harry yelled, grabbing Draco's dead body and shaking it furiously.

"Please? I can't live without you. I love you too!" Harry sobbed into Draco's dead form.

"We'll make it! I promise!" Harry cried hysterically, hugging Draco's body like doing so would bring him back, but Harry knew it, Draco was dead. Nothing could change that.

Harry watched Draco's body be carried away. It had been hours before he could let go of it. Harry felt completely numb.

He turned around and looked at the stars. He walked over to the window he intently stared through.

The stars were the last thing Harry Potter ever saw. The papers reported that, shortly after Draco Malfoy committed suicide, Harry Potter too had killed himself by jumping from the Astronomy tower at Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry.

His tombstone simply read:

_Harry Potter_

_May he and Draco finally find happiness._


End file.
